Change

When I was younger I would have my parents write down the words that I would say, onto paper and those would be my books. At five years old though, I had my mind made up that I was going to be a singer.

“I don’t think I’m as shy as I used to be,” I said to my mom one day as she was working in the kitchen at our old house. The kitchen was so small though, that it was like stepping into fire every time that the stove was on. I could tell that my mom was listening, so I continued. “I think that I want to start singing for people.”

I had a church girl’s voice, soft and pretty, and if I would’ve decided to stick to singing in church (which I never did have enough guts to actually do) I might have been able to keep that voice.

But I took my soft voice and tried to change it to a voice that I never would be able to master.

In fifth grade I said to my friend, “You like to write don’t you?”

She nodded. “Yup. Why?”

“I do too. We should write a book together.”

So we tried to. But way too many people were writing it together. So it didn’t work. Later again that year, my friend and I tried to write another book together, but I couldn’t relate to the things that she wanted to that time.

Growing up in church I had no desire to write about evil spirits and gory things, so we didn’t get very far in that one either.

In my fifth grade year also, I tried to sing a little bit, but it didn’t work too well. I tried out for a singing part in the play, but it didn’t work. And I was going to sing in the talent show with another friend, but soon gave up.

In sixth grade I really noticed how much I absolutely loved to write, so I wrote my first book. It ended up being only eighty-six pages, written out on wide-ruled notebook paper. I kind of gave up on singing to that year. The most that I ever sung then was when I was having secret contest (whether she knows it or not) with a girl from my class, when the class would sometimes sing at the end of the day. I did sing a trio that year also, but it didn’t give me the same thrill as I had when I finished that book.

The summer before seventh grade I didn’t write as much, because I had writer’s block.

A couple of weeks into seventh grade I became a born-again Christian. I also started to rewrite my first book. I don’t remember when I finished it, but I finished it in enough time to write my second book around the end of the school year. I also get to sing with the ministry team at my school now, which is fun because it’s not my life, but it gives me something to do, quietly in the background.

Now this summer I’m happy.  I’m writing four books. One about a fifteen-year-old spy, who’s dad was drafted off to war, and how she handles everything that life throws at her. Another titled Sunshine Through Rain. That one is about an abused girl who doesn’t think that God would ever except her for who she is. The third one is called Mirror Image. It’s about these two girls, one from almost a hundred years ago, and one from modern day, accidently switch places. The last one is about a conservative Christian family who lives in a day where Christianity is illegal. I also have an awesome writing partner named Rebekah. We write a lot together and love to talk about plots and characters.

I’m also happy though, because of my friends. Every single one of them, from the ones who live a mile away, and the ones who live 2,000 miles away. I’m happy because of my faith. I’m happy because of my family. And believe me. The list could go on and on.

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